WHY MEN CHEAT

“WHY DO MEN CHEAT?”  This has been a question posed by women since waaaay before I was born.  This has been a question that many men have avoided as much as possible.  This has been a question that many men don’t have the answer to.  This has been a question that many men have given answers to.  This has been a question that whether men have avoided it, not known the answer to it, or actually answered it, results in the same general reaction from women:  They’re just as dissatisfied as they were before they asked, and they continue to ask this question.  Well ladies, I’m going to attempt to satisfy your craving for the answers to your question, but like most other men, I probably won’t please all of you (all pun intended).

IT’S MY CAKE, WHY SHOULDN’T I EAT IT?

So let’s start off by getting the obvious, shallow reasons out of the way.  Some men are just plain greedy.  They want to jump as many bones as they can whether they’re in a relationship or not.  They’ll even try to justify their greed by expressing a sense of entitlement.  I remember back in my undergrad days, a guy I know once said, “Why would God have given me a lifetime of sperm if he didn’t want me to spread my seed?”  Now I’m not saying what he said didn’t have some legitimate sense to it, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think that statement was inspired by greed.

“IT’S YOU OK! I LEARNED IT BY WATCHING YOU!”

Some men cheat because that’s how they were raised (albeit intentionally or not).  They may come up as children watching their father run around with different women.  I personally know (and know of) men whose fathers would take them along when they would go to be with their various women.  They’ll tell you, that was the life they knew then, so that’s the life they live now.

PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT!

Now here’s a shell shocker for some of you women out there.  As much as you may complain about weak sex from men, please understand that wack pussy does exist!  Yeah I said it!  Bad sex can definitely turn a man to seek sex elsewhere.  What constitutes crappy cooch?  Well that’s a matter of opinion.  Some of you like to be lazy during sex.  Some of you like to be plain during sex.  Some of you just don’t know what you’re doing and don’t try to learn.

WHAT THE FUCK! (WHERE’S THE FUCK IS MORE LIKE IT)

…But to the women who are giving up the weak buns…AT LEAST YOU’RE GIVING IT UP!  Which leads me to another reason men cheat; a total lack of sex.  In case you haven’t figured it out by now, the average guy likes sex.  Scratch that.  THE AVERAGE GUY LOVES SEX!  If you deprive that man of that which he’s come to love, why wouldn’t he seek it elsewhere?  Now I’m not saying that sex is everything, but it’s a major thing!

WHEN IT RAINS IT POURS

We’ve all probably heard the term “Nobody wants you until you’re taken”.  The very truth in this statement can attribute to a man going astray.  At this point some of you ladies might be saying “GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE”, but just hear me out.  Women are used to men pursuing them; it’s in our very nature to skirt-chase.  So when a woman is spoken for, and a man tries to get at them, it’s generally believed that she can turn him down with no sweat (I stress GENERALLY believed).  However, when women decide they want a taken man, he might be in a bit more of a pickle.  As I said earlier, a man is used to hunting, not being the prey.  So when a woman goes after him, he may not be readily prepared ward her off.  If she’s aggressive enough, the flesh can get weak, and before you know it he’s all shacked up.  Now you ladies may still be saying “GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE”, but I know you feel me at least a little bit (jus don’t feel me too much, after all I am a man).

BOYS WILL BE BOYS.

You know how women are always saying how guys can be so immature, or act like children?  Well if you’ve ever made such a claim then you should also understand that we need almost as much attention as a child.  Just think about it:  We want you to feed us, clean up around us, care for us when we’re sick, and generally pay attention to us (except during the game).  If a child is not getting adequate attention from their mother, then they may very likely turn to their father.  If a man is not getting adequate attention from his woman, he may very well set his sights on another woman.

Now I know plenty of you wish to make the statement “Well if it’s that bad that he must cheat then why doesn’t he just leave”.  I plan to answer that in my next blog entry.  In the mean time, what I suggest you do is take what I’ve given you, and use it to lay down the blueprint on how to reduce the odds of a man going astray.  Outside of the greedy man, the purpose of the examples I gave is to show you ladies that it’s going to take work, probably hard work to keep a man faithful.  Don’t let this get you down though.  After all, aren’t the best things in life hardest fought for?

The Image above is from the movie "Hav Plenty"

SOMETHING ON THE SIDE

 

“How the hell could you mess with another woman’s man!?”  “Do you really want to keep getting his sloppy seconds!?”  These are just a couple of the phrases that we hear all too often when people address the matter of the mistress, mister, or quite simply “the side joint”.  As long as I can remember, it’s being the side joint has always been taboo.  They’re never respected, and people tend to blame them for the break-up of a happy home.  People generally don’t see what good could come out of being the side joint.

My question is this:  Have you ever truly asked a side joint why they would choose to be just that?  Everyone speaks up for the boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife.  Yet no one speaks on behalf of the third party.  Well even criminals get to be heard/represented in a court of law, so I say let’s look into the potential benefits of being on the side.

Ideally, one benefit of being the side joint is the no-strings-attached-sex.  Think about it!  Often time, if a taken man or woman gets involved with you, it’s usually for sex and not much more.  Now one may argue that you can get that kind of sex from a single person.  I won’t argue that possibility, but all too often we’ve seen or experienced the situation where one person begins to want more than sex.  Did you ever stop to think that this happens because that person has the option of focusing all their time on you?  Undivided attention from her can often equate to unwanted attention from him.  Start sexing someone who can only afford to pay you limited mind, and you’re good.  Of course nothings guaranteed, but if I were a betting man, I’d most certainly play those odds.

Now let’s address the opening lines of this entry.  How could she mess with another woman’s man?  Easy, she’s attracted to him, and she has no ties to the other woman (or maybe she does have ties to her and just doesn’t give a damn).  Maybe the question you want to ask is, “how could he mess with another woman?”  As for the one about sloppy seconds; seconds are only sloppy if you’re eating directly out of his plate.  So as long as she bathes regularly, there’s nothing sloppy about it.

People like to call side joints home-wreckers, but are they really?  They usually have no attachment to the home ‘nor the other people in it.  It’s not their job to preserve the home.  So if anyone’s a home-wrecker wouldn’t it be the boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife in question?  Actually let’s go out on a limb and look at it from another angle.  Often time a side joint may help to distract a person from whatever’s making them unhappy in their relationship.  If the side joint is successful in serving as this “escape” of sorts, then the chances may be better of that person going home happy.  If they’re happy, and they make their unsuspecting partner happy, then wouldn’t that make the side joint sort of a home-preserver?  There may actually be some good in the bad you accuse them of doing.

We tend to bash the side joints of the world, but are we really just in doing so?  After all, don’t we support music that glorifies cheating?  “Me and Mrs. Jones”, “Kiss and Say Goodbye”, “As We Lay”, “My Little Secret”, “Boyfriend Number Two”, and the list goes on.  We don’t condemn these people, so why should we condemn the people who simply seem to be living out these lyrics?  After all, “A meal ain’t a meal without something on the side”…Right?

MEN LIE WOMEN LIE

“Why be in a relationship if you’re going to lie?” 

How many times have you heard that line?  So many people believe that there should/will never be any lies in a perfect relationship.  What is a perfect relationship anyway?  We may have to address that in the next blog post.  But I digress.  A relationship isn’t necessarily bad if there are lies that are told.  Just like many facets of a relationship (or life in general), it’s all relative.  Let’s look deeper into this.

If your woman asks you if she looks fat or ugly in an outfit, you may have been taught to tell her she looks fine, just to avoid any conflict.  This is an instance where the truth should probably be told; because if you think she looks bad (and you’re a man) then lord knows who else will share your same feeling.  The same applies vice versa.  Don’t you want your better half to look like your better half?  I believe issues like how your lady looks in a dress or to-do’s on a list shouldn’t be lied about.  What are you truly protecting by lying about it?  If the truth were to come out that you lied about these little things, then your bf/gf might wonder what else you’re capable of lying about.

Sometimes lies are just plain necessary.  Yea I said it!  Let’s be honest (no pun intended), if we told the truth to our significant others 100% of the time, then they’d probably break up with us about 80% percent of the time.  Can you imagine always telling your girlfriend or boyfriend every time you had a lustful thought about another person if they asked?  How about if they ask how many people you had sex with (assuming you had a high number)?  Or if they questioned whether you’d be into certain things that you know they’re not (i.e. orgies, swinging, anything)?

Countless times I’ve heard women ask “why must a man lie about cheating on his woman.”  He lied because he doesn’t want to lose his woman.  He wants to keep his relationship in tact!  If he told the truth, she might up and leave.  “Then why not leave her for the other woman?”  He may have 100 reasons for that.  Now I’m not going to get into the whole why men cheat debate, but you wanted the truth, and there’s your truth.

People don’t really want to know the truth to the questions they ask.  They wish to believe they want to know, but they soon find out they can’t handle the truth.  Even as much as I’d like to believe that I can accept any truth my woman tells me.  She may possibly be holding the one straw that could break this camel’s back.  Lying in a relationship may not be the most positive method on the surface, but it might possibly be the best option considering all possible alternatives.  There’s some truth for you.  Now can you handle that?

FRIENDS TO THE END?

“There’s no such thing as male/female friendships.”

“A female friend is just someone a man hasn’t fucked yet.”

These are just a couple of the statements I’m sure many, if not most of us have heard over the course of our lives. For me it raises the question: Can men and women truly be platonic friends? Some may say yes, many will say “hell fuckin’ no”. It’s commonly believed that in a male/female friendship that someone is always interested in being more than just friends; that often-time the interested party is secretly biding their time, hoping for an “opening”.

If this is always the case, then what does that say for all of my female friends? Should Keesha be worried about me trying to pipe her the next time I see her? Should I be worried about her trying to ride this cock? Are Andie and I liable to fuck any time we hang out? The editor of this very blog is a good female friend of mine. Should I only maintain internet contact with her for fear of two freak Scorpios being in the same place, and consequently getting’ it on? On second thought, maybe I should avoid her. I’m just kidding (but I’m not) (inserts LOL here for wifey’s benefit).

Seriously though, how am I supposed to properly function as the socialite that I am if the woman who is being my friend (or at least is pretending to be) has a “fucking” agenda? (Pun intended) How am I supposed to maintain the beautiful friendships I have with women if they’re worried about me trying to penetrate their “fleshy gates”. If everybody’s on-guard, are we truly friends? How many platonic, opposite-sex friendships do you really have? Take a personal inventory and hit this blog with your results.

LABEL MATES

“You got a boyfriend?” 

“Something like that.” 

“Is that your wifey?”

 “Nah not really, we’re still kind of dating.” 

“If you two are together, why is he still going out on dates with other women?” 

People have questions and conversations like these all the time.  The reason is because couples either don’t communicate or fail to realize what stage or type of a relationship they’re in.  It’s about time we tried to really break down what these labels mean.

1. FUCK BUDDIES

Do you really need an explanation for this?  If so, I might need to create a relationships (or relations) 101 blog just for you.  Fuck buddies are two people who agree to simply have sex with each other.  Nothing more; nothing less.  They’ll usually only contact each other to set up sexual encounters.  Might they have casual phone conversation?  Maybe, but the purpose of these conversations is still usually to set up sex.  They’re entire association is predicated on sex.  Simply put, they’re just fucking.

2. FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS (F.W.B)

Some people may confuse F.W.B.’s with fuck buddies.  The difference between the two is the FRIENDS part.  The two parties have already established a friendship.  These friends may spend so much time together that a mutual physical attraction developed.  Then the “Right Place Right Time” scenario may have played itself out, leading to their initial sexual encounter.  From then on they decide to continue having sex without taking it to “the next level” (whatever that may be).  So they’re still friends, they’ve just decided to add said benefits.  Although being friends can prove easy, adding benefits can make things tricky.  When you throw sex into the equation, rational thoughts can become irrational, and sound judgment can become mute.  Often time one of the friends will develop feelings from the benefits, and begin to act like they’re exclusive.  Now if the other party has not agreed to these new terms, it can cause not only a problem with (receiving) benefits, it can lead to a rift in the friendship.

3. DATING (or “TALKING TO”)

Dating is pretty much just that.  It’s where two parties agree to start going out on dates, usually to get to know each other better and see where their situation may lead.  The actual dates don’t have to be limited to the clichéd dinner and a movie.  You can do or go wherever so as to learn about the other person.  The thing about dating is that you may be free to date other people.  After all, just because you’re starting to learn about a person doesn’t mean you can’t learn about others.  What people tend to misconstrue when dating is prematurely expecting exclusivity.  What they must realize is that many to most people don’t just start dating with the expectation of being exclusive.  Dating is a process of feeling someone out (or up ;<)).  I mean don’t you feel a few mangos or try on different outfits before choosing one?

4. COMMITTED EXCLUSIVE RELATIONSHIP (C.E.R.) (also known as, “WIFED UP”)

A C.E.R. should be self-explanatory, but since things don’t always work the way they should, I’ll give you my definition of it.  In a C.E.R. both parties have agreed to be committed exclusively to each other.  This means no more pursuing, sexing, or dating other people.  You’re no longer on the “market”.  You’re no longer “playing the field”.  You’re ready to settle with this one person for the long haul.  Does this guarantee that you’ll be in it for the long haul?  No!  But it means you’re giving it a try.  Well people may say if a C.E.R. is that cut and dry, how do you explain the ones where one partner is still seeing other people?  Well either both parties did not agree to be committed to each other in the first place, or someone’s a cheater-plain and simple.  Why did that person decide to cheat?  Well that’s a topic for another blog discussion.

Now this blog entry is not meant to tell people what kind of relationship they should be in, nor is it some map directing you to that special someone.  Consider this simply my mini dictionary to you, because if you can be clear about what you’re getting into, you may be able to avoid cloudy judgment.  I’m simply trying to help you look before you leap.  Any feedback, questions, or opinions are greatly appreciated.

WHAT'S BLACK WHITE AND RED ALL OVER

WHAT’S BLACK, WHITE, AND RED ALL OVER

“What’s she doing with his white ass!” “White women are snatching up all our good men!” “Why don’t you find yourself a nice Asian man!” These statements are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the feelings of disapproval that people express toward interracial relationships. This has been an ongoing dilemma for many years, and doesn’t seem to be heading toward a conclusion any time soon. We are so many years removed from colonialism, slavery, the holocaust, etc. Women have taken on positions in which the decisions they make shape the minds of men, and change government policies. Yet we live in a country where the mere presence of a Black person holding hands with a White person, or maybe a Hispanic person holding hands with an Asian person, can bring about scornful looks and remarks from the general public. This seems especially interesting seeing as how the U.S. President is bi-racial. Yes we all tend to call him Black (especially me), but the fact of the matter is President Obama is half Black and half White. So I guess the question is: what’s the problem? What’s the big deal? Let’s analyze some of the stigmas attached to being in an interracial relationship.

1.Choose a Side

Many people try to justify their disapproval of interracial relationships by saying if the couples have children, the children will suffer. They believe this suffering will come in the form of torment, or confusion. I’ve heard people say, other kids will make fun of them because of their mixed race, or a child will not know which culture to embrace or identify with. Let’s be honest people! Kids are going to make fun of other kids for something. If it’s not race, it’s size; if it’s not size it’s looks. So no matter the couple, their kids will need to be prepared for torment. As it pertains to the cultural aspect, who says kids can embrace only one culture? The human brain is capable of accepting many cultures, so two should be no problem. Both my parents are Black, but one is from the American south while the other is from the Caribbean. Two different cultures indeed, but I’ve never had a problem accepting both.

2.What’s Their Problem?

People often try to dissuade others from getting involved in interracial relationships by saying things such as “People are going to look at you funny”, or “Imagine the insults you’re going to hear.” You also have the “statisticians” who’ll point out something like “X amount of interracial couples have been subject to verbal or physical assault blah blah blah.” Is this not really a part of life people? Granted it might be an unfortunate part of life, but a part of life nonetheless. I’m sure I represent a shitload of people when I say that at some point in my adult life, I’ve been looked at funny, insulted, and been involved in verbal or physical confrontations. Often time I’ve been subjected to this by my own people, and I’ve never been in an interracial relationship. Ultimately shit happens.

3.Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

Of course you often can’t speak about these relationships without bringing in the family. There are so many people who will not stay in a relationship with someone they care about because of their parents’, or other family members’ disapproval. At the same time, there are many parents who will not approve of their child dating outside their race. What that could potentially do is lengthen, or make more complicated, a person’s search for the “one”. I personally know families like this, and they all have their reasons. I even understand some of these reasons. Even if the reasons make no sense at all, people are still willing to let go of their happiness just to appease their family. Here’s my thing. As an adult, you should be able to figure out what’s best for you. If my mother didn’t like my current girlfriend (which she does), that doesn’t mean I’d just break it off. You just deal with it. Everybody’s not going to like everybody. I guess at this point, the onus is on the individual to decide if it’s worth losing that special someone just to please others. Will you be pleased at the end of the day? Hell, if you have true family, they’ll get over it!

Now my purpose here is neither to promote nor reject interracial relationships. I’m simply here to give you opinionated folk something more to think about. I want to thank Greg Thomas for inspiring me to write this blog entry. Please feel free to follow and comment on the spot.

YOU MADE YOUR BED, NOW LAY IN IT!

I want to address a long-standing, unresolved problem that women tend to create for men. The problem: letting a man into your bed with no intentions on gettin’ it poppin’. Simply put, you’ll let a man lay with you, when you’re not trying to fuck! So for those of you who are too dumb, naive, or selfish to understand this, I’m going to break down a few things from the man’s point of view.

About nine out of ten times, if a man gets in your bed, he either has sexual intentions, or will develop sexual intentions. If you share no such intentions, then you need not even let him get that far. Shut him down early if you’re going to shut him down at all. Send him home, make him sleep on the couch, or wherever, as long as it’s not in your bed. I can’t begin to count all of the negative situations that could develop as a result of your willingness to let him sleep with you, coupled with the lack thereof to let him “sleep” with you. With that said, please allow me to highlight a few.

1. Ain’t Nobody Humpin’ Around
You can create a very awkward situation for the two of you when you let him in, but don’t “let him in”. When a man makes a move on you, and it gets shot down, often time he may not know what to do next. “Should I leave? Then I might look like a jerk.” “Should I try again? Then I might seem too thirsty.” Those are just a couple of thoughts running through the man’s mind during the awkward situation. Now he might not feel as comfortable approaching you in situations in or out of the bedroom, because he doesn’t know what you’re thinking about him. You yourself may not know what to think about him or your situation anymore. All because you let him in, but didn’t “let him in”.

2. OOPS! Did I Do Thaaat?
You can leave a man highly frustrated (sexually and emotionally), when you stunt on him in bed. Women, I need you to understand the power of the male erection. Better yet, I need you to understand the impact an erection in “vein” can have on a man. You getting a man hard, then not sexing him is like falsely setting off a fire alarm. You stir up a whole bunch of commotion for nothing. The same way it’d take a while to calm down a crowd of panicking people, is the same way it’d take a while to calm down his erection. It can be a real “head” ache.

3. SIKE!!!
You can make a man resent you for faking him out in the bed. Now don’t try the whole “Well if he’s going to get mad over that, then he doesn’t deserve me” bit. In a man’s mind, what you did was deceitful to him, and that’s just wrong. Think about how you have felt after being deceived. I imagine it wasn’t a good feeling. Men not only share that same ill feeling, but it’s also simultaneously coupled with the afore-mentioned erection that he now has to deal with until it goes away. “DAMMIT” is his first thought at this point. “MAN FUCK HER” might be his last.

4. Beware of Dog
On a much more serious note, whenever you let a man lay with you, and you turn him down for sex, you put yourself in a potentially dangerous situation. That’s how rape or other forms of sexual assault can occur. Now of course, in no way, shape, or form does this justify assault, and any man who commits such an act is a low life bastard and should be punished! But women, you open yourselves up to these potentially dangerous situations by letting him into your bed without the common desire for sex.

So to all the pump-faking, cock-teasing, dick-dodging women out there, I want you to hang these thoughts over heads, and over your beds. If you let him stay, you let him lay. If you’re not down with his flow, you make him go.

TO BE OR NOT TO BE (GAY THAT IS)

Ok I was watching the Tyra Banks show one day (don’t judge me, it’s entertaining) (http://tyrashow.warnerbros.com/ ), and the topic was centered around men who claim they are straight, but work as gay prostitutes, or do gay pornography for pay. No, that wasn’t a mistype. These men claim they are heterosexual, yet engage in homosexual sex for money. News Flash! Contrary to what these men and other people who agree with them believe; if you have homosexual sex, YOU’RE GAY! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not here to judge anyone for being homosexual (because who am I to judge right?). I’m here to set the record straight on what I believe it means to be a gay man. If you have sex with a man, you’re gay. If you perform sexual acts with a man, you’re gay. I don’t even understand what would make one think otherwise. These “straight” men claim the reason they don’t consider themselves gay is because they’re not sexually attracted to, aroused by, or interested in men. Well I’m not interested in constantly lying, but if I lie everyday because someone paid me to, then that makes me a liar. Furthermore, as a man, if you can get your dick hard to sex another man, then I think you are sexually attracted to, aroused by, or interested in men.
Men are not the only ones who I think are guilty of not acknowledging their homosexuality. I hope the women didn’t think I’d let them off the hook so easily. So again, I was watching Tyra (like I said, it’s entertaining, stop judging), and the topic, this time, was centered around women who label themselves “barsexuals”. A “barsexual” is defined as a woman who kisses or flirts with other women only in bars and other public settings (http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-barsexual.htm), usually done to titillate a boyfriend or male onlooker with no intention or desire to follow through with same-sex actions (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bar-sexual). These women don’t consider themselves lesbian because they’re not sexually attracted to, or interested in women. They claim that they would never engage in such acts outside of a bar or similar venue. News Flash number 2! If you’re a woman, and you go around sucking face with other women (in public or private); YOU’RE A LESBIAN! You want to believe you’re not a lesbian, because homosexual acts amongst women is more accepted than those among men. Think about it, put two men in that same “barsexual” situation, and they’ll probably immediately be pegged as fudge packers. So why would the rules change for women? They don’t, it’s just easier to stomach two women kissing, than two men.
Now I would gather that there are representatives in the gay/lesbian community who would say that I’m wrong, and these people are not really homosexual, because it’s a whole way of life, commitment, etc. Well that may very well be the case, from a homosexual point of view. However, as a straight guy, I feel like once you cross over, you’ve crossed over. I’ve even heard straight women and men who’ve disagreed with what I’ve said about these “straight” people. To them I say, picture your man or woman in that same situation, and see if you wouldn’t call them gay. Say what you will people, the window dividing homo from hetero is not that foggy. Now it’s not mine to say whether a guy should be sucking cock, or a woman should be eating cooch; but it is mine to let you know how much louder your actions speak than your words.

TRY SLEEPING WITH A BROKEN HEART

“Sex Me”, “Anytime, Anyplace”, “Love in the Club”, “I Invented Sex”. Whenever I hear the songs associated with these titles, I don’t usually want to make love, or have some “magical” night. I usually just want to get my “rocks” off, bust a nut, or simply put, I just want to fuck. Yes I said it, I just want to fuck. Don’t act all shocked, the blog spot warned you about adult content before you clicked “continue”. Besides, chances are you’ve felt that same way at one point or another. You were probably just too shy to admit it.

The world we live in seems to have been ever-so-rapidly shifting away from the “Signs of Love Making”, over to “Bangin’ the Headboard”. My parents had artists like Percy Sledge saying “Take Time to Know Her”, or Otis Redding telling people how strong his love is. I had artists like Snoop Dogg saying “Bitches ain’t Shit but Hoes and Tricks”, or Ice Cube rapping about how he “killed the punani”. My parents’ artists might have had them wanting to make love, whereas some of my artists made love the furthest thing from my mind.

Many of the television shows we watch encourage engaging in casual sex, and promiscuity, with the agenda of avoiding love. MTV’s Real World puts seven horny people in a house together with a hot tub, bar, and limited access to the outside world. When they do let them out, they let them go to bars and nightclubs with more hot horny strangers. You think they do this with the mentality of love in the air? No they do this hoping that there will be “Socks in the Air”. The Bad Girls Club, Jersey Shore, and a multitude of other shows have all followed the same suit; “Let’s Fuck, Fight and Fuck Some More”.

There seems to be, in my opinion, somewhat of a revolution against the “L” word. Why, do you ask? Well of course the answer depends on who you ask. For many people, I gather their reasoning would be because they’ve had their heart broken before, and they don’t want to risk further hurt. For others, they may have been close to those who’ve suffered heartbreak, and decided they don’t ever want to chance going through such an ordeal themselves. Hell, some people may just want to fuck!

Now many of you may say “Yea right, there’s no better feeling than being in love”. Having been with my woman for ten years, I can definitely understand the “pro-loves” notion. However, there’s a part of me that can’t help but wonder if the “anti-loves” may be on to something. Sometimes when we look at love, we tend to forget that even love has a dark side. Being in love can open you up to potential heartbreak. If my woman were to cheat, or leave me, I know I’d suffer emotionally. In that case, love would be the culprit that set me up for such pain. Love has made people fight, rob, steal, and kill. Have you ever seen the movie “Troy”? That war happened because one man fell in love with another man’s woman. Just put yourself in the “anti-love’s” shoes. Imagine, sex with no emotional attachment. Imagine fulfilling your carnal desires with no worry of a relationship. Imagine a world with no heartache. Imagine simply fucking! You’ve never seen a heartbroken porn star have you?

Now I’m not saying whether love is or isn’t the way to go. Personally, I made my choice to go with love. However, who am I to frown upon the person who chooses not to fall in love? The “pro-loves” are quick to use the cliché “’Tis better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all”. Well in the words of the wonderful Alicia Keys, I say “Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart”.