TO BE OR NOT TO BE (GAY THAT IS)

Ok I was watching the Tyra Banks show one day (don’t judge me, it’s entertaining) (http://tyrashow.warnerbros.com/ ), and the topic was centered around men who claim they are straight, but work as gay prostitutes, or do gay pornography for pay. No, that wasn’t a mistype. These men claim they are heterosexual, yet engage in homosexual sex for money. News Flash! Contrary to what these men and other people who agree with them believe; if you have homosexual sex, YOU’RE GAY! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not here to judge anyone for being homosexual (because who am I to judge right?). I’m here to set the record straight on what I believe it means to be a gay man. If you have sex with a man, you’re gay. If you perform sexual acts with a man, you’re gay. I don’t even understand what would make one think otherwise. These “straight” men claim the reason they don’t consider themselves gay is because they’re not sexually attracted to, aroused by, or interested in men. Well I’m not interested in constantly lying, but if I lie everyday because someone paid me to, then that makes me a liar. Furthermore, as a man, if you can get your dick hard to sex another man, then I think you are sexually attracted to, aroused by, or interested in men.
Men are not the only ones who I think are guilty of not acknowledging their homosexuality. I hope the women didn’t think I’d let them off the hook so easily. So again, I was watching Tyra (like I said, it’s entertaining, stop judging), and the topic, this time, was centered around women who label themselves “barsexuals”. A “barsexual” is defined as a woman who kisses or flirts with other women only in bars and other public settings (http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-barsexual.htm), usually done to titillate a boyfriend or male onlooker with no intention or desire to follow through with same-sex actions (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bar-sexual). These women don’t consider themselves lesbian because they’re not sexually attracted to, or interested in women. They claim that they would never engage in such acts outside of a bar or similar venue. News Flash number 2! If you’re a woman, and you go around sucking face with other women (in public or private); YOU’RE A LESBIAN! You want to believe you’re not a lesbian, because homosexual acts amongst women is more accepted than those among men. Think about it, put two men in that same “barsexual” situation, and they’ll probably immediately be pegged as fudge packers. So why would the rules change for women? They don’t, it’s just easier to stomach two women kissing, than two men.
Now I would gather that there are representatives in the gay/lesbian community who would say that I’m wrong, and these people are not really homosexual, because it’s a whole way of life, commitment, etc. Well that may very well be the case, from a homosexual point of view. However, as a straight guy, I feel like once you cross over, you’ve crossed over. I’ve even heard straight women and men who’ve disagreed with what I’ve said about these “straight” people. To them I say, picture your man or woman in that same situation, and see if you wouldn’t call them gay. Say what you will people, the window dividing homo from hetero is not that foggy. Now it’s not mine to say whether a guy should be sucking cock, or a woman should be eating cooch; but it is mine to let you know how much louder your actions speak than your words.

TRY SLEEPING WITH A BROKEN HEART

“Sex Me”, “Anytime, Anyplace”, “Love in the Club”, “I Invented Sex”. Whenever I hear the songs associated with these titles, I don’t usually want to make love, or have some “magical” night. I usually just want to get my “rocks” off, bust a nut, or simply put, I just want to fuck. Yes I said it, I just want to fuck. Don’t act all shocked, the blog spot warned you about adult content before you clicked “continue”. Besides, chances are you’ve felt that same way at one point or another. You were probably just too shy to admit it.

The world we live in seems to have been ever-so-rapidly shifting away from the “Signs of Love Making”, over to “Bangin’ the Headboard”. My parents had artists like Percy Sledge saying “Take Time to Know Her”, or Otis Redding telling people how strong his love is. I had artists like Snoop Dogg saying “Bitches ain’t Shit but Hoes and Tricks”, or Ice Cube rapping about how he “killed the punani”. My parents’ artists might have had them wanting to make love, whereas some of my artists made love the furthest thing from my mind.

Many of the television shows we watch encourage engaging in casual sex, and promiscuity, with the agenda of avoiding love. MTV’s Real World puts seven horny people in a house together with a hot tub, bar, and limited access to the outside world. When they do let them out, they let them go to bars and nightclubs with more hot horny strangers. You think they do this with the mentality of love in the air? No they do this hoping that there will be “Socks in the Air”. The Bad Girls Club, Jersey Shore, and a multitude of other shows have all followed the same suit; “Let’s Fuck, Fight and Fuck Some More”.

There seems to be, in my opinion, somewhat of a revolution against the “L” word. Why, do you ask? Well of course the answer depends on who you ask. For many people, I gather their reasoning would be because they’ve had their heart broken before, and they don’t want to risk further hurt. For others, they may have been close to those who’ve suffered heartbreak, and decided they don’t ever want to chance going through such an ordeal themselves. Hell, some people may just want to fuck!

Now many of you may say “Yea right, there’s no better feeling than being in love”. Having been with my woman for ten years, I can definitely understand the “pro-loves” notion. However, there’s a part of me that can’t help but wonder if the “anti-loves” may be on to something. Sometimes when we look at love, we tend to forget that even love has a dark side. Being in love can open you up to potential heartbreak. If my woman were to cheat, or leave me, I know I’d suffer emotionally. In that case, love would be the culprit that set me up for such pain. Love has made people fight, rob, steal, and kill. Have you ever seen the movie “Troy”? That war happened because one man fell in love with another man’s woman. Just put yourself in the “anti-love’s” shoes. Imagine, sex with no emotional attachment. Imagine fulfilling your carnal desires with no worry of a relationship. Imagine a world with no heartache. Imagine simply fucking! You’ve never seen a heartbroken porn star have you?

Now I’m not saying whether love is or isn’t the way to go. Personally, I made my choice to go with love. However, who am I to frown upon the person who chooses not to fall in love? The “pro-loves” are quick to use the cliché “’Tis better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all”. Well in the words of the wonderful Alicia Keys, I say “Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart”.